BOATPIG Page 175a
Barely have your lips finished forming the words Vangelis that you realise you are catastrophically wrong. The Bureau are too disgusted with your spectacularly shameful failure to even dignify you with a verbal rejection, instead they merely shake their heads. - GAME OVER
Your Ending
The awkward silence is broken by a loud cracking sound above your head, barely have you registered this than you are crushed to death by a large chunk of rock that had been lovingly carved into the shape of a synth.
Your Achievements or Otherwise
- You made it to the interview = +1pt
- At which you then died = -2pts
- You were crushed to death by a Fairlight CMI synth shaped rock, the very synth Jan Hammer used to produce Crockett’s Theme = -50pts
- If this seems like an unnecessary hammering home of the point, lose an extra point = -1pt
- Your application was formally rejected, your shameful death publicised to the world and your home town renamed to “CrockettsThemeWasComposedByJanHammerVille”= -57pts
- Now that is unnecessarily hammering a point home = +1pt
- You are now aware of quite how important a good knowledge of Jan Hammer and Vangelis is to the Bureau = +1pt
- You are in absolutely no state to use this knowledge = -26pts
- Emotional State; crushed, shamed and dead. Mostly dead. = -19pts
Ranking
- Grand Total = -152pts
- Rating = Being dead you were never going to get a good score, but to fail at such a key area of Bureau Lore as this… If anything you got off lightly and your score should have been lower.
- Future Life = You are dead and beyond resurrection. What do you think your future holds? Unravelling the secret of Cold Fusion?
Would you care to try again?