bp105

BOATPIG Page 105

You confidently state your ten letter word; Stav-Bureau. Even over the phone you can sense Stav’s disgust as suddenly you remember that hyphenated words aren’t allowed in Countdown.

Your shame is interrupted by the screech of a white transit van pulling up beside you, from which a gang of former Countdown champions burst out and hustle you into the back of the van. As the van races away you wonder what horrors the Knights of Whitely have in store for you for your crimes against Countdown. - GAME OVER

Your Ending

You have been taken to the depths of the disused former Countdown studios in Leeds where after a quick trial, and a decidedly tricky numbers round, you are found utterly guilty and sentenced to the terrifying Oxford Water Torture. In this fiendish punishment you are strapped to a table and then volumes of the Oxford English Dictionary Second Edition are dropped onto your head. You manage to last a decidedly average seven volumes before the cumulative impacts take their inevitable toll.

Your Achievements or Otherwise

• Your application is formally rejected by the Stav Bureau on the request of El Presidente = -10pts
• You died. = -10pts
• Of being repeatedly hit on the head with volumes of the OED. = +1pts
• You may be in a position to contact the deceased Richard Whitely = +8pts
• He will not be pleased to see you = -18pts
• Emotional State; dead = -1pts

Ranking

• Grand Total = -30pts
• Rating = While your score isn’t that negative, you are not a member of the Bureau and you are still dead so it’s not exactly a triumph is it?
• Future Life = Dead and likely to remain so.

Would you care to try again?